Loving the Chaos

Do not fear going forward slowly; fear only to stand still.

Chinese Proverb

With all of the quick fix advertising that is in our faces, it’s easy to get discouraged with the speed of our progress. We are bombarded on TV and magazine covers with promises of major change in only 6 weeks. It’s no wonder then that when we set goals we sometimes set unrealistic timelines for achieving them.

Once we get discouraged, it’s not long until we quit all together. Small steps taken consistently create sustainable change. So shift your focus away from how quickly you are getting to your goal. Instead focus on today’s habits that will lead you to tomorrow’s success.

Here’s a thought:

It doesn’t matter how fast you are moving on a continuum. It matters most what direction you are facing.

Are you facing in the right direction with your goals?

If no, then pivot around and start facing the other way.

If yes, then focus on the small steps that help to move you forward. That’s how you create success.

Most people tell me they don’t have as much life balance as they would like. So when I spoke recently at a women’s wellness conference, I asked the ladies to share their best life balance tips – the recharge and re-energize advice they would give a friend when life seems out of whack.

Here’s some of the simple life balance tips that they came up with. Like any tips, these ones only work if you do them!

Learn to say no.

Ask yourself about a decision or purchase: what it? need it? like it? use it? afford it?

Have fun.

Get a sense of humour.

Spend time only with the people you really want to.

Give yourself permission to take a break.

Go for a walk and pay attention to your surroundings.

Stand still, be quiet and drink a glass of water.

Live up to your own expectations, not other people’s.

You can be aware of a need without feeling that you must fix it.

Sleep, eat, exercise, play & pray.

Exercise with passion.

Ignore things that don’t matter.

Take one day to do something you enjoy.

Give back  responsibilities to the person who owns them.

Take a long bath.

Read a book.

Step back & take a breath.

Schedule me-time along with your other commitments.

Smile.

Celebrate your milestones.

Declutter.

Be clear on your goals.

Have patience with yourself.

Eliminate should and have to from your vocabulary.

Prioritize.

Stay focused & positive.

Ask for help.

Listen to relaxing music.

Use positive self talk.

What’s your best life balance tip?

The trouble is you think you have time.

Jack Kornfield

We all tend to postpone those things we know are important. Busy schedules and conflicting priorities seem to get in the way.

What important thing are you procrastinating about?

Whether it is a greater commitment to working out, making healthier food choices, decluttering your living space or telling someone how much you appreciate them, whatever it is that you are putting off, begin today.

If today was your last chance to say something that’s been left unsaid, who would you talk to?

If today was your best chance at beginning a new habit or project, what would it be?

Remember tomorrow is promised to no one.

Start today.

The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

Erma Bombeck

One of the keys to successfully taking on a new habit is being clear about why you are doing it. Many people set goals without really thinking about the big why:

What is the important reason for making this change?

Knowing your “meaningful motive” lets you align your goals with your personal values.

When things get tough or you are distracted by less important priorities, the underlying motive for your new habit becomes a key in sticking with your goal.

So when you are creating a new goal or establishing a new personal habit, take the time to get clear about your meaningful motive.

What’s the reason that you would be willing to put this goal first above other priorities or distractions?

What concrete difference will this make in your life?

Get that part figured out and sticking with your new habit, even in the tough times, will be easier.

In having this conversation with yourself you might also  find that this goal is not all that meaningful to you – or not enough to make the change. In that case, let it go and find the goal that does make sense for you right now.

The body never lies.

Martha Graham

We often look outside ourselves for information. We read the latest books and surf the web and ask our friends. Those are all great sources of information. Remember that there is another great place to look: inside yourself.

The body knows long before your mind catches up.

If you listen to your body carefully, it will tell you exactly what it needs: more rest, less stress, to move and stretch, nourishment or water. It will tell you whether you are doing too much or not enough.

Check in with yourself throughout the day.

Are you feeling tension anywhere in your body?

Do you need to sit and just breathe for a few minutes?

Are you hungry or thirsty?

What is your energy level like?

At the end of the day when you are in bed, ask your body what it needs.

Take the time to listen to the information your body has. It’s far wiser than you imagine.

We do not stop playing because we grow old. We grow old because we stop playing.

Benjamin Franklin

Are you having fun? If your answer is “no”, then perhaps its time to get back in the game.

Having a sense of play makes it easier to stay focused on your goals. It helps your energy stay high and lets you enjoy what you are doing. If life is all about work and no play, then you’re missing the big picture. Life is too short to get old.

Post a comment and share your ideas:

How do you incorporate play into your day?

Don’t wait for a light to appear at the end of the tunnel. Stride down there and light the bloody thing yourself.

Sara Henderson

One of the worst things to wait for is for things to change. A lot of time can pass sitting in the dark waiting for someone else to switch on the lights.

If you find that your current situation is not serving you as well as you would like, take charge. Either get up can create a new set of circumstances or change your attitude about the ones you are in.

It’s never your circumstances that hold you back. It’s how you think about them.

Post a comment & share your ideas:

How do you create a new set of circumstances?

The quieter you become, the more you can hear.

Ram Daas

When you first read that quotation, you might think, “Well duh.” Of course if you are quieter, you will hear more.

Just because we know something is true, doesn’t mean we always act on it.

Is your day filled with noise? Finding a little quiet time is a terrific daily ritual that let’s you stop, breathe and hear the voice of your own wisdom instead of the hustle bustle of the world and your inner chatterbox.

Set aside some quiet time – even 5 minutes – and listen to what you have been

missing.

Post a comment & share your ideas:

How do you create quiet time?

Wealth is the number of things you can do without.

Dostoyevsky

Sometimes we get caught up in the collection of material possessions and lose sight of the richness in the simplest of things.

Take some time to consider what you really can’t do without. Chances are it doesn’t come from a big box store or with a fancy label.

Ask yourself what you might gain from downsizing, decluttering or simplifying. You likely are far wealthier than you think.

Leave a comment:

In what ways are you wealthy?

Never mistake motion for action.

Ernest Hemmingway

Are you constantly in motion?

Perpetually busy?

Just because you don’t have a spare minute doesn’t mean that you are engaged in purposeful activity. If you find yourself with a lack of energy or enthusiasm, take inventory of how you are spending your time.

Chances are there are lots of tasks that keep you busy but don’t help move you closer to your goals. Giving up some of your busy work makes more time and energy for activities that are fun, meaningful and satisfying.

Leave a comment:

What keeps you way too busy?