Loving the Chaos

January is often a time when people reflect on the past year’s accomplishments and look ahead to what’s possible in the new year. People think about the bad habits they have and all the things they really should stop doing. You’ll hear them talking about giving up smoking or being a couch potato or not spending so much money or being disorganized. Depending on your personal goals, giving up any or all of these things could be a great use of your time, energy and focus.

While there are lots of things that you might choose to give up this year, there’s one thing you can let go of that will most definitely create positive changes in your life. It actually would impact on any of the goals that you set for yourself this year.

So what’s the one thing to give up this year?

Mediocrity.

We currently live in a culture that embraces mediocrity. That’s probably because many people are overcommitted, overscheduled and overwhelmed. When that happens, the idea of doing things that are “good enough” is awfully appealing. You slip into a pattern of settling for an “okay” existence because it feels like the path of least resistance. The problem with that approach is you end up cheating yourself out of the best life available to you.

Think about personal best

Instead of choosing mediocrity this year, think instead of your personal best. That’s something completely different from focusing on perfection which is a highly over-rated and unattainable goal. Striving for perfection often leaves you exhausted and unsatisfied. Imagine your daily personal best in fitness or nutrition or relationships or self care. If you set that as the standard for guiding your choices each day, now imagine what changes you would create by the end of the year.

Giving up mediocrity is more about giving your best effort on any given day. What does that mean? You make a conscious effort to give your focus and attention to the task at hand. You recognize that on some days you have more – or less – energy to give to a task. It also means that you stop overloading your plate with so many commitments you can’t possibly do any of them well. By focusing on your personal best you stop settling for so-so and will likely experience a greater degree of satisfaction.

When you think about what you want to give up this year, stop giving up on what’s possible and think seriously about giving up mediocrity.

Lately there seems to be a glimmer of hope in all the doom and gloom about the economy. While people might be feeling a little more optimistic, unemployment numbers are still on the rise.

Facing a potential job loss can make you feel like a victim. You spend time and energy worrying and your stress level rises.

There is another way.

Instead of playing the victim in these economic times, you can be proactive in your outlook and actions. Give these workplace ideas a try:

Let go of worry.  Some things are simply out of your control. It’s an unfortunate reality that good people doing good work might still lose their jobs. Instead of spending your time worrying, use that energy to control the things you can – your attitude and actions.

Give up the doom & gloom attitude. In every crisis there is at least one opportunity. We just tend to miss them because we are so focused on the negative. Use this time to practice gratitude for what you have, and keep your eyes peeled for the opportunities. Your attitude at work impacts on your perceived value to the company. Nobody wants to keep a negative nelly.

Become solution focused. Shift into a “how can we..” perspective. Companies are looking for out of the box thinking to help weather these challenging times. Offer potential solutions rather than complaints.

Be a team player. Use “we” rather than “I” thinking. This economic situtation is not just happening to you. Demonstrating a “we’re all in this together” philosophy helps to create optimism. Building relationships is key in your long term success in an organization.

Design a Plan B. Consider now what you would do if you were laid off. Planning before an emergency lets you think with a clearer head. Take a look at your finances and see where you might cut back. Brush off your resume. Keep your industry contacts fresh. Often simply having a plan B makes people feel more secure as it removes some of the uncertainty.

Get back to the basics. During uncertain times there is a great opportunity to take inventory of your life and make some changes. Do you spend your time and energy on the most important things? Are you doing work that you enjoy? Do you have a list of life goals and a roadmap of how to achieve them? Now’s a terrific time to do a little self assessment and re-align things that are off track.

The downturn in the economy is just the current situtation.

Circumstances are never what hold you back.

It’s the way you think about them that makes you unhappy or stuck.

Choose something more empowering than victim.

I don’t know too many people who don’t have at least one thing they want to do but they never seem to get around to doing it. 

Like starting a fitness program.

Or losing a few pounds.

Or tackling the clutter in your house.

Or creating a little me-time.

Or whipping your finances into shape.

Or maybe it’s something else.

What I do know is that putting things off brings you temporary relief at best.

And no matter how creative you get, there’s a little corner of your brain that knows an excuse when it hears one.

So why do you put so much time into avoiding the things that you say you want to do?

It’s usually that you are missing one or more of the key elements to quit procrastinating and as my mother used to say, Get cracking!

Maybe you need a stronger reason for doing it. 

Maybe you need a little encouragement – or a kick in the butt.

Maybe you need some new strategies cause the old ones aren’t working.

Maybe you need some more accountability.

The other thing I know is when you finally take the leap and stop procrastinating, it doesn’t take nearly as much energy to be successful as it did to keep making excuses.

What have you been putting off?

If you’re looking for a stronger reason, or a little encouragement, or some new strategies or more accountability, check out this program.

There’s no use waiting for your ship to come in unless you have sent one out.

Belgian proverb

What action do you need to take?

It’s about now that people’s commitment to their New Year’s resolutions begins to wane. Before you know it that bounce in your step has been traded for one more hit of the snooze button. Sometimes that happens because you have taken on way too much like planning to go from couch potato to marathon runner in 8 weeks or less.

Small changes done consistently day in and day out lead to big success.

If your resolve to make a change this year is starting to slip, now’s the time to refocus.

Ask yourself some powerful questions about what you want to achieve in 2009. These are great questions to consider in quiet reflection or in conversation with your partner, friends or family.

Get clear about what you want to happen this year and then start with something simple.

What word best captures your focus for 2009?

There’s something curious about our desire to have science validate things that we know in our hearts. It’s happening a lot lately on the topic of happiness – research on what “really” makes someone happy or how happiness works.  Even Buddhists monks are participating in experiements to figure out the connection between meditation and happiness.

Dan Pink shares the latest list of things that make you happy according to scientific research.

So let’s conduct a little research of our own:

What makes you happy?

Post a comment and share your happiness secrets.

Ask Laurel…Every January I make a New Year’s resolution and by February it’s fallen by the wayside. How do I stay on track with my goal?

It’s inevitable at this time of year for people to start talking about New Year’s resolutions. Some people make the same one year after year. Some people staunchly delcare, “I don’t do resolutions.” And some people think about it and then never take any action.

New Year’s resolutions have gotten a bad reputation.

That’s because when you  say you’re going to do something and then you don’t, you start to feel really bad. You begin to doubt your own credibility. And if you’re someone who makes a public statement and then doesn’t follow through, everyone thinks “Yeah yeah, heard that one before.”

There’s nothing wrong with making a New Year’s resolution. 

Here are 2 things to keep in mind when you do. First, the start of a new year gives the sense of a clean slate so it’s natural to think about change at that time. However, there’s nothing magical about January 1^st that automatically will lead to your success. Setting a new goal requires thought and commitment. Making a declaration at a party on New Year’s Eve or at the urging of someone else is not a great jumping off point for change.

Plan more 

Secondly, many New Year’s resolutions are made without sufficient planning. Even with a mindset of determination, being successful with a goal takes planning: both what you will do and how you will manage the inevitable obstacles that pop up along the way. Consider what’s reasonable to accomplish given your starting point. As you experience success you can always set the bar higher or take the next step.

Successful people also excel at Plan B. Think ahead about the kinds of set backs you might encounter and consider how you will tackle them. Then when they show up, you’re better prepared to manage them.

Kick Start the year 

If you’re looking for a way to get the New Year off to a great start, join me for the Kick Start 2009 teleclass on January 8th. Read more here.

You can also check out the 30 Day Challenge on the right side of the page under Categories. It’s a great way to begin creating a habit that sticks. Start at Day One and then come back each day for the next tip.

What is your resolution for 2009?

Today our American neighbours go to the polls in what will be an historic election on many fronts. No matter the outcome, a whole bunch of people will end up being disappointed.

Check out a great blog post from That Cool Broad in which she suggests that Monty Python’s philosophy of looking on the bright side of life is the way to handle it.

While we know that Monty Python often has a bit of a warped worldview, this time they get it just right.

From the serious to the mundane, election results to traffic jams, life brings to you lots of stuff you want and lots you’d rather not have. The key to success is always in choosing your perspective or attitude about what’s unfolding.

Looking on the bright side of life is a great mantra for election day and every other one.

What’s your outlook for today?

Ask Laurel…

With all of the gloom and doom news in the economic markets these days I find myself worrying more. What’s a good way to manage this uncertainty?

 Worry is an unproductive activity. It uses up your time but doesn’t really change anything. You can decide instead to be proactive.

When the going gets tough, successful people get back to basics.

Now is a great time to take inventory on all levels – financially, emotionally, physically and spiritually.  Are you clear on your priorities?

Do your current choices and behaviours reflect those priorities?

Is a small or large re-adjustment needed?

Course corrections, whether in financial markets or in life, are a time to step back, evaluate, plan and act wisely. Also remember that no matter the current challenge, there is also an opportunity waiting to be seized. It’s easy to get distracted by worry and miss an opening that might serve you well.

Take inventory. 

If you are looking for a quick tool to take inventory, visit my website http://www.stonecirclecoaching.com and look for the Wheel of Life in the Free Stuff section.

Post a comment and ask Laurel your life coaching question.

Today is day 30 of the 30 day challenge.

Congrats!

You made it. Today is the day to begin your celebration. It’s been great accompanying you on this journey.

You now have the tools to create a new habit. Use what you have learned this month and apply it to a new habit that you would like to master. Building a series of personal success habits begins just like this. Get one habit working, then add another one in.

Please share your success stories by posting a comment.

My challenge…

Cal is one happy dog. He’s loved getting out on a regular basis and doing dog stuff. He’s a clever guy. He watches carefully to see what I’m wearing and which shoes I’m reaching for. Not sure how he knows what “walk clothes” are, but he does! It used to be that he could hear the jiggle of his leash from anywhere in the house. His hearing is not so good anymore but his eyesight is just fine. It’s been great for me to remember all the things I loved so much about our walks. I really look forward to my daily dose of dog wisdom and am grateful to have re-created this habit.

What’s your 30 day success story?